If somebody comes into the room at home, or into the office or shop, looking as if he meant to make trouble, just try switching your attention straight to the Divine, instead of squaring up aggressively to meet the difficulty or shrinking away to avoid it, according to your temperament. You will be amused and gratified to see the anger fade from the subject’s face (which will mean that it has faded from his heart too) and quite a different expression take its place.
I have myself seen several cases where men, and on two occasions, children, were actually fighting, and upon a spectator’s “turning the cheek” the strife ceased like magic. Animals respond even more easily to this treatment than do human beings. I have seen two instances where dogs were fighting savagely and all efforts to separate them had failed, when the realization of the Presence of God’s love in all His creatures restored peace. In one case it took several minutes’ work; in the other it was practically instantaneous.
Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good (Romans 12:21).
This is a tough one! It is a real challenge for one to realize the presence of God when someone is trying to start an argument with them. However, doing so has two major benefits. It stops the offense from escalating further into a confrontation and it usually eliminates the existing conflict. The natural human response is to fight or run. Neither response solves the problem or returns the environment to a positive state.
When love and the presence of God is returned for anger and aggression visited against someone, the aggressor is significantly deprived of the ability to direct their anger at their target and must find another emotional state in which to express their feelings. This can open the door to dialogue and accommodation; a door which is slammed shut when we respond with fight or flight responses.
Try this the next time an angry person is directing aggression toward you. Say to them that God is present with you both and that his desire is that we work out our differences in a respectful and caring way. Tell them you care about that which angers them and that working together, the problem is more easily resolved. If the person is still being aggressive, then tell them that clinging their anger is the real problem and they will have to be angry by themselves. Then excuse yourself, and say you are open to resolving the problem when they have overcome their anger and when a respectful and considerate discussion can take place.
In the vast majority of cases, this approach will peacefully and permanently resolve the conflict. In those cases where it fails, you have still done the right thing and acted to minimize the negative impacts of the conflict in the short and long term. Then your conscience will be clear and you are freed from the shackles of anger and judgement. The aggressor, on the other hand, will be left to stew in their juices while you rise above the heat. When one answer’s anger with love, they are offering peace to both parties. When the aggressor refuses that love, the Bible says it will be as if they had burning coals heaped on their head.
While we should prefer loving solution to conflicts; we can live with their burning coals if they can, until they experience a change of heart themselves. Then we should always leave the door open for God’s presence to enter in and resolve the conflict with light instead of heat.
Heaping love,
Z gardener
Good Morning Garden 
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